hi just a quick update =) i love blogging here at milpages, but i decided to extend my reach to a wider crowd. while blogging here i will also be blogging over at http://www.armywifewithamarinecorpsstateofmind.blogspot.com, thank you for all of the comments and i really like to see that i am helping =)
Bryan and Madonna Lancaster started this journey together in 2001 at North Springs High School in Atlanta Georgia. Bryan and Madonna knew that this wan’t an everyday ordinary kind of lifestyle. they knew that it was going to be non stop excitement and adventure. Bryan then made the commitment to join the Marine Corps and was accepted on March 24th 2004 as stated by Bryan ” it was the happiest day of his life” . Bryan then left to boot cam at Paris island south Carolina and did 13 weeks in “hell” only to return home after Boot Camp, MCT and MOS School to the birth of his 1st child Jayda Renee Lancaster born 05/18/2005 their first duty station was camp Pendleton ca. and that is where the journey began. Jayda was soon followed by Joshua David Lancaster born 10/02/2006, Bryan discharged from the marine corps honorably and made the switch to Army life in 2008. and we are anxious to see where it leads. i hope you guys enjoy this blog because my husband and i are merely the writers and our friends and family are nothing more than our cast. you guys are our audience and we hope you enjoy..
one of the Actors
one of the actresses
The Writer's
When I joined the Marines,
I knew I could die.
I put away my blue jeans,
And packed my bags with a sigh.
I said good bye to my mom and dad
Mom cried her eyes out,
It made me feel pretty bad.
I promised to come home, but we all had our doubts.
My dad said for me to stay strong,
And to keep a stiff upper lip.
He said I’d be back before long,
And gave me a few wartime tips.
I said good bye to my girlfriend.
We made it known,
That letters we would send,
Because I couldn’t call home.
I said good bye to my little sis,
No longer would her life be pure bliss.
Her company I would, of course, miss,
I gave her a long hug and a kiss.
When I went to war,
I saw terrible things;
Dead and wounded men galore.
I wish I could have grown wings,
So I could have gotten out!
I fought with hardness, valor, and pride!
I never had a doubt,
That I would not have died…
I was shot in the heart,
That place you have for special love.
Yes, it was painful, but I was done playing my part,
I began to feel at ease as my soul drifted above.
Now as I look down on my family,
I’m glad I fought with dignity and pride!
I know that they miss me,
But I’m happy that’s how I died.
Dying for their right and freedom,
Was the best way to go.
My life was over and done,
It was worth the pain– just thought you should know…
By Hannah Mureen
this poem is in no way mine this is the poem i found for my husband when he first joined the marines, as you can see i am a faithful military spouse, i lived first and foremost as a marine wife (one of the toughest, and now i am gladly converting to an Army wife and i intend to be the best one i can be)
ok so i dont even know where to begin with this one. i know some of you reading have maybe heard of all of the horror stories that being in the military, and living a military lifestyle may bring. but omgoodness WOW! i say wow because wow is the nicest things i can say. lol here is the beginning. some of you reading know that my hubby just switched over from the marine corps to the army… Well in my opinion, the army life is great!! they are family oriented and they do what ever they can to help. and so on. which is great!! but some of the people here both the spouses and the locals are UNBELIEVABLE!!. RUDE… OBNOXIOUS… NASTY….GRIMY… all of the textbook horror vocab words you can come up with just about sums up the majority of the local/military spouse population here. they all gossip. ALL of them are on the look out for the next big drama. i feel like i am in high school all over again… i originally started this blog to just casually talk about our adventures and things we encounter along the way… i guess this is one of those kind of encounters. but seriously??!! i never knew that there could be so many of the same kind of people in one spot? at first i thought that it was a joke when the people welcoming us to the base were like “stay away from the wives” lol but i have been proven wrong, they are all into starting and or continuing the drama, while holding and playing the mommy/wife to a military member card. and it sickens me because there is way more of them than there is more of me… don’t get me wrong i do’nt have to have friends or be around it. i’m just to the point where i want to live as peaceful as possible while supporting the love of my life and raising our kids. is that too much to ask for? OH!! and the kicker….. are you ready??!!………you sure??…….THEY ARE ALL OLDER THAN ME??!! i have to say i expected it from people my age, but when you are in a place where all of the ladies you are supposed to betaking an example from are acting like 17yr olds then i think i’m better off alone.. how about you? until next time
ML
ok so open letters are a way that people can vent about the things in their life, they are called open letters because there are’nt any responses…. here are some of the things military spouses write in their open letters =)
i remember it like is was yesterday, we had just had our daughter and my husband got stationed at Camp Pendleton California, i had only bee in the states for 8 years so California was a long way away for me, but little did i know i was going to love it…. SO!! where do i even begin about california? California is everyone’s dream, it has a year round temperature of about 60 and the hottest it gets is about 95 or at least where we were, our base was on the pacific coast, and the water was freezing but it was gorgeous to look at. when i first exited the airport in San Diego, the air smelled kind of sweet, it could of been me but it did look, feel, and smell very different. EVERYTHING from the people right down to the food, was nicer, sweeter and so much better than GA (in my opinion). San Diego Airport was great, and the drive to the base was even better, Camp Pendleton Falls Exactly In the middle of LA and San Diego, Ca it has the southern California feel from the great weather all year round to the people, omg i loved the people. the base covers 3 zip codes in itself and there are still parts to this day that i have yet to see. i want to say if you are a military spouse who has an opportunity to visit California…. TAKE ADVANTAGE because it is a must see place. i loved the fact that i got to meet people from all over the world, and the marines ad sailors i met through my job were even more amazing (the well seasoned ones to be exact) at my job i got to deal with alot of navy and USMC Retired personnel and their stories were always the best. all in all our first duty station was a blast!!! i only hope that every other station we get over the next 15 years are as memorable as Camp Pendleton. thanks again for your time
Madonna
As military spouses, we often find ourselves having to know a little something about practically everything at any given time. Or, at least, we have to know where to go to get that knowledge. In the old days, we either relied on the chain of command or on other spouses for any nuggets of wisdom to help make our lives easier. Thankfully, times have changed.
Being a Military Spouse is said to be the toughest job in the Military. It is a hard job and has big shoes to be filled. But it CAN be done. We hope you find this section helpful. Remember that you are not alone in all of this. Be proud that you are too one of the few.
What does it take to make a military marriage work? Between spending months apart, being uprooted every two years and dealing with his unique job pressures, life and love in the military can be exciting — but also overwhelming. “There are times that you just hope for a phone call or an e-mail from your loved one, and you are really scared,”
WHAT TO DO ABOUT BASIC TRAINING:
Learn about the military
“Educating myself was a huge help. I read everything I could find on programs that pertained to my husband. He bought me a book about Military spouse’s, and what their lives are like. This all helped me to be more understanding when he couldn’t call as often as we both hoped, or when we’d have to deal with last-minute travel changes.”
Stay positive
“Being a military spouse is not easy, but staying as positive as possible can really help you through it.”
Don’t “rank” friends or others
“Hold your head high no matter what your husband’s rank is. Each and every job is important. They depend on one another! When my husband and I move and meet new people, rank never ever comes into the picture. The friends we make are dear to us because of who they are in the inside, not what is on their shoulder or sleeve.”
Be flexible!
“My favorite quote is, ‘Always flexible. We have to be,’ from Semper Gumby. As an example, I had chosen a wedding date and planned our ceremony, but it wasn’t until three days beforehand that everything was a ‘go.’ That’s when my husband called to say he was on his way home.”
Learn when to compromise
“While all relationships are difficult at times and compromises have to be made, women should not compromise beyond their limitations to make the relationship work. There is a line between compromises you have to make because your boyfriend or husband is in the military, and compromises you are asked to make because of unfair expectations he expresses about a relationship. A woman dating a military man [or married to a military man] should be strong enough in her character to recognize that line.”
Make new friends, but keep the old
“Don’t turn your back on your old friends just because you have a new life. It will get harder to stay in touch, but the time you take to work at those friendships will pay off when you do get to go ‘home.’”
Get organized!
“When it’s time to move, I always make a folder with information I’ve printed from the installation’s Web Site. It’s filled with emergency numbers, command numbers, information on utilities, the claims office phone number, the inbound shipment’s phone number and more. Then, I throw in a couple of sheets of paper and a pencil. That way all the information we need is in one place.”
Separate the needs from the wants
“Make a checklist of things you’re going to want. Depending on how long your things will be in storage and where you’re moving, you may want or need seasonal items.”
Check the local news
“Find out if the newspaper from the area is online. You’ll be able to look up apartments or houses to rent, as well as jobs if you want to work. Most times you can have it emailed daily.”
Get references
“Ask your landlords for a written letter of recommendation. Keep the originals in your files, and make copies for potential future landlords. Be sure, also, to keep a list of their phone numbers, addresses and management company names for quick reference. You don’t want to lose out on a great place because you don’t have that information handy.”
THESE YES ARE WHAT MARINE WIVES LIVE BY…. this is what i lived by but i do strongly believe that these can be used for any military spouse being that we all go through the same EXACT situations:
Marine Wife Prayer
Give me the greatness of heart to see,
The difference between duty and his love for me.
Give me understanding so that I may know,
When duty calls him, he must go.
Give me a task to do each day,
To fill the time when he’s away.
When he’s in a foreign land,
Keep him safe in your loving hand.
And Lord, when duty is in the field,
Please protect him and be his shield.
And Lord, when deployment is so long,
Please stay with me and keep me strong.
~Author Unknown
Ballad of a Marine Wife
Submitted by: Wendy
I wake in the mornin, runnin outa bed,
Chasin hungry babies and tryin to get em fed.
Get em ready for school, all dressed and set,
Haven’t forgotten anything yet,
Push em out the door so they won’t be late,
Gotta get one to daycare, and set the oldest one straight.
I sit back in my chair, run my fingers through my hair,
Wish you were here, but I know why you’re there.
Well the days gone without a hitch,
No sickly younguns, or excuses to pitch
Cattle are in, and the dogs are fed,
Kids bathed and tucked soundly in bed.
Dutch wonders where ya are and I tell her all I know,
It takes my breath away, when she says I miss my daddy so.
I crawl into bed, hold your ol shirt tight,
I smell ya like ya next to me and I somehow feel alright.
Some days are maddening and the world seems all-wrong,
Every hard thing happens and the radio plays every sad song.
Deep sighs and long cries don’t seem to ease the pain,
Then comes the weather with its never-ending rain.
What Military Wives Are Made Of
Author Unknown
It was just another harried Wednesday afternoon trip to the commissary (grocery store on military bases). My husband was off teaching young men to fly. My daughters were going about their daily activities knowing I would return to them at the appointed time, bearing, among other things, their favorite fruit snacks, frozen pizza, and all the little extras that never had to be written down on a grocery list. My grocery list, by the way, was in my 16-month-old daughter’s mouth, and I was lamenting the fact that the next four aisles of needed items would wait while extracting the last of my list from my daughter’s mouth, when I nearly ran over an old man.
This man clearly had no appreciation for the fact that I had 45 minutes left to finish the grocery shopping, pick up my 4-year old from tumbling class, and get to school, where my 12-year-old and her carpool mates would be waiting.
I knew men didn’t belong in a commissary, and this old guy was no exception. He stood in front of the soap selection staring blankly, as if he’d never had to choose a bar of soap in his life. I was ready to bark an order at him when I realized there was a tear on his face.
Instantly, this grocery aisle roadblock transformed into a human…”Can I help you find something?” I asked. He hesitated, and then told me he was looking for soap.
“Any one in particular?” I continued.
“Well, I’m trying to find my wife’s brand of soap.” I started to loan him my cell phone to call her when he said, “She died a year ago, and I just want to smell her again.”
Chills ran down my spine. I don’t think the 22,000-pound Mother of all Bombs could have had the same impact. As tears welled up in my eyes, my half-eaten grocery list didn’t seem so important. Neither did fruit snacks or frozen pizza.
I spent the remainder of my time in the commissary that day listening to a man tell the story of how important his wife was to him — how she took care of their children while he served our country. A retired, decorated World War II pilot who flew missions to protect Americans still needed the protection of a woman who served him at home.
My life was forever changed that day. Every time my husband works too late or leaves before the crack of dawn, I try to remember the sense of importance I felt that day in the commissary.
Some times the monotony of laundry, housecleaning, grocery shopping, and taxi driving leaves military wives feeling empty — the kind of emptiness that is rarely fulfilled when our husbands come home and don’t want to or can’t talk about work.
We need to be reminded, at times; of the important role we fill for our family and for our country. Over the years, I’ve talked a lot about military spouses…how special they are and the price they pay for freedom too. The funny thing is; most military spouses don’t consider themselves different from other spouses. They do what they have to do, bound together not by blood or merely friendship, but with a shared spirit whose origin is in the very essence of what love truly is. Is there truly a difference? I think there is. You have to decide for yourself…
Other spouses get married and look forward to building equity in a home and putting down family roots. Military spouses get married and know they’ll live in base housing or rent, and their roots must be short so they can be transplanted frequently.
Other spouses decorate a home with flair and personality that will last a lifetime. Military spouses decorate a home with flare tempered with the knowledge that no two base houses have the same size windows or same size rooms.
Curtains have to be flexible and multiple sets are a plus. Furniture must fit like puzzle pieces.
Other spouses have living rooms that are immaculate and seldom used. Military spouses have immaculate living room/dining room combos. The coffee table got a scratch or two moving from Germany, but it still looks pretty good.
Other spouses say goodbye to their spouse for a business trip and know they won’t see them for a week. They are lonely, but can survive. Military spouses say good-bye to their deploying spouse and know they won’t see them for months, or a year, or longer. They are lonely, but will survive.
Other spouses, when a washer hose blows off, call Maytag and then write a check out for having the hose reconnected. Military spouses have to cut the water off and fix it themselves.
Other spouses get used to saying “hello” to friends they see all the time. Military spouses get used to saying “goodbye” to friends made the last two years.
Other spouses worry about whether their child will be class president next year. Military spouses worry about whether their child will be accepted in yet another school next year and whether that school will be the worst in the city…again.
Other spouses can count on spouse participation in special events…birthdays, anniversaries, concerts, football games, graduation, and even the birth of a child. Military spouses only count on each other; because they realize that the flag has to come first if freedom is to survive. It has to be that way.
Other spouses put up yellow ribbons when the troops are imperiled across the globe and take them down when the troops come home. Military spouses wear yellow ribbons around their hearts and they never go away.
Other spouses worry about being late for mom’s Thanksgiving dinner. Military spouses worry about getting back from Japan in time for dad’s funeral.
The television program showing an elderly lady putting a card down in front of a long, black wall that has names on it touches other spouses. The card simply says, “Happy Birthday, Sweetheart. You would have been sixty today.” A military spouse is the lady with the card, and the wall is the Vietnam Memorial.
I would NEVER say military spouses are better than other spouses. But I will say there is a difference. I will say, without hesitation, that military spouses pay just as high a price for freedom as do their active duty husbands and wives.
Perhaps the price they pay is even higher. Dying in service to our country isn’t near as hard as loving someone who has died in service to our country, and having to live without them.
God bless our military spouses for all they freely give.
When the good Lord was creating military spouses, He was into His sixth day of overtime.
An Angel appeared and said, “You’re having a lot of trouble on this one. What’s wrong with the standard model?”
The Lord replied, “Have you ever seen the regulations? It has to be completely independent, must be sponsored to get on base, have the qualities of both mother and father during deployments; Be a perfect hostess to four or 40, handle emergencies without military orders, cope with the flu and move around the world, have a kiss that cures anything from a child’s torn valentine to a soldier’s weary day, have the patience of a saint when waiting for the unit to return stateside, and have six pairs of soft hands.”
The Angel shook her head slowly and said, “Six pair of hands? No way!”
And the Lord answered, “Don’t worry. We’ll make other military spouses to help. Besides, it’s not the hands that are causing the problem – it’s the heart. It must swell with pride, sustain the ache of separation, beat soundly when it’s too tired to do so, be large enough to say ‘I understand’ when it doesn’t, and say ‘I love you,’ regardless.”
“Lord,” said the Angel, touching his sleeve gently, “go to bed. You can finish that tomorrow.”
“I can’t,” said the Lord. “I’m too close to creating something unique. Already I have one who can heal itself when sick, feed unexpected guests who are stuck in the area due to bad weather, and wave goodbye to its spouse from a pier or runway and understand it’s important to the country that the spouse leave.”
The Angel circled the model of the military spouse very slowly. “It’s too soft,” she sighed.
“But tough,” the Lord said excitedly. “You cannot imagine what this being can do or endure!”
“Can it think?” the Angel asked.
“Can it think? It can convert 1400 to 2 p.m.!” the Lord said.
Finally, the Angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek. “There’s a leak,” she pronounced. “I told you that you were trying to put too much into this model.”
“It’s not a leak,” said the Lord. “It’s a tear.”
“What’s it for?” asked the Angel.
“It’s for joy, sadness, pain, loneliness and pride,” the Lord said.
“You’re a genius,” said the Angel.
The Lord looked somber and said, “I didn’t put it there.”
~Author Unknown
this is one of my favorite Military Spouse Poems when i first saw it i was working in the 22 area Military Clothing Store on Camp Pendleton California, i loved it then and i love it now, ENJOY to all who reads this
hello guys and gals, I’m new to this whole new blogging world and i figured that me posting on here from time to time would not only relieve some stress but it would also give people an insider’s view to a military spouse’s world. so are you interested yet? if not them I’m sorry i wasn’t able to hold your attention maybe soon so check back from time to time if you can, but for those of you who are then hold on tight cause here we go…
, on a lighter note I saved a ton of money at the grocery store the other day, I didnt buy junk food or steaks..I dont know how to work the grill 
